Lately FireFox and Mozilla have been implicated in funding Antifa. I now use other browsers only, but not FireFox. FireFox is off my list. I have uninstalled it from my computer. I felt a spiritual burden taken off me after I took it off my computer a few months ago after I found this stuff out. I am so so so disappointed. The modern FireFox browser is the modern evolution of the original Netscape, which I loved to use during its heyday. I loved using FireFox in its early days being so much better than the IE of the day. But now with other browsers being of great quality, it is so easy to discard FireFox and Mozilla. I heard Mozilla people say they wanted out of their deal with Microsoft sometime after a deal was cut, but they are the hypocrites. Microsoft is like a hot air balloon, and Mozilla is some ballast that needs to be cut so they can soar higher.
Okay so recently i meet with my sister who lives in another state and was just talking. She then brings up a old friend from the past, nothing romantic on my end but i knew this kid when i was like 13. Back then he had this huge crush on me and even admitted he fell in love with me. But hey we were just kids at this age. Anyways , She comes to tell me like a year ago he asked about me and how i was doing , also if i was still in a relationship. Mind you at that time me and my sister weren't on good terms, so we weren't talking So she tells him i'm doing fine and all. But when she told me about this i ended up looking him on social media and seen he is actually doing pretty good with making his music and actually really cute ! Since then i cant stop thinking about re-connecting with him , you know to see how he is doing . But i know that my boyfriend who i have been in a relationship with for about 3 years in a half would have a issue with that . Side note: my boyfriend isn't the type to like me having any " guy friends" .Anyways, for the last couple of days my old friends has appeared in my dreams and you know we did " stuff " . But now i kinda feel guilty for even thinking of him that way while being in a relationship. And deep down i just feel like i just wanna know what it would feel like to be with someone else. And honestly guys its not that i am in a bad relationship like things are good between me and my boyfriend but i just don't know what to feel / think ? need some feedback !
So, I've always lived with my mom until 3 yrs back, when I came to a different city to attend college. 2 days ago was my birthday. I recieved a package from my mom. It was a hard drive. When I looked into it, it was full of videoes and pics of my mom having sex with men.lots of men. Some from our neighborhood. My school teachers, my principal, my classmates. She did all kinds of stuff you see in porn. From gangbangs to bukkakes. Everything. I don't know how to respond. Why would she send me those. Is she some whore
My answer is in most circumstances, NO. However one circumstance where I am willing to kill others is to defend this nation. IF Antifa is stupid enough to try an armed revolt I am willing to shoot at them. I have prayed that Antifa's efforts on Nov 4 translates into just protests and even a little rioting that can easily be dealt with by riot police. For the safety of their own lives I pray they do not attempt an armed revolt. I don't want to ever have to fire a weapon at another human being, but I will do so to defend this nation, whether the enemies are foreign or DOMESTIC. I hope I am making myself perfectly clear.
Against a woolen sweater that was blue, that's all that I remember of you;
Before you learned to walk, I learned to run;
I guess the ants really go marching one by one;
When a train rolls in, the doors open, I get in...
Last night I had a pleasant nightmare.
There's an ocean formed outside my bedroom door,
on the sleepless nights I listen to it roar;
there's a road too long to walk, too steep to climb,
at the end of it, is what you left behind;
and when that train rolls in, the doors open, don't get in...
Last night I had a pleasant nightmare
That moment when you realise that all along, you were just present in this time or all this time for being happy for others and being of help for their happiness but never yours. It's quite tragic but at the same time, a nice feeling to know you're contributing to others happiness. It must be life's other way of saying "ha bih this is what u get for living" lmao.
Man it's hard, like I don't know why I'm crying rn cuts of joy or sadness that I'll never find the right type of happiness for myself. O welll ~
From what I hear Antifa may be planning mass actions on Nov 4th that involve mass protests more than an armed revolt. I have heard reports that elements of Antifa may be planning more violent actions including revolts. It has been uncovered they are working on acquiring AK-47s. I don't think patriots, police, or National Guard should be hasty to use excessive force against protests, and they should use non-lethal force on rioters. I do think any rioting or protests that block people from doing normal business should lead to arrests. However I think patriots should practice their shooting the rest of this month, and have guns at the ready, or know where to get guns and ammo fast. If it is necessary to fight Antifa militias from overthrowing the government, we should be ready to do that. I am fuzzy as to their plans and if that will be necessary at the moment, but if it becomes necessary, we should be prepared to do it.
Warning everyone planning on doing business with an individual named Alex (Alexander) Shchekin, currently residing in Long Grove, IL.
I have never written anything like this before but wanted to share some quick facts about this individual and issue a warning.
If you don't feel like spending a few minutes reading this then here is a short version: DON'T GIVE ALEX SHCHEKIN A SINGLE PENNY AS HE IS FRAUD!
Alex, aka Sasha, aka Alexander Shchekin is a professional scam artist who feasts on the poor, ignorant, and desperate
people. Along with an individual named Andrew Menasce they have 2 websites: Intergam.com and ReadOz.com. He claims that he is about to go public with his company and that he no longer needs investments from anyone, but he will do you a favor and let you buy
some left over shares for just a fraction of the cost. When my partner and I bought well over $25k worth of shares from him and signed the contract,
he began systematically failing to deliver on any of his promises and giving an excuse, after an excuse, after
an excuse as to why that happened. As I began searching more about him I realized that EVERYTHING that this guy says is complete and utter lie...
Every page that you will ever find about him, like facebook, zoominfo, vc, twitter, etc that supposedly have his
name, or his company ReadOz mentioned in them, are all made by Alex Shchekin himself in a very poor attempt to try and make himself look bigger
than he actually is… He is currently being sued by at least 4 different parties for the same exact company (ReadOz)
that he claims is about to go public. He claims his other company called Intergam makes $45 mil./year, yet his website is not even finished, it
was forcefully shut down by the government twice for a failure to pay the annual corporate filing fee, he has no customer service,
his address is a PO box, and when you call the Contact # it goes straight to a voicemail. I found out that his ReadOz company that he claims is just
about to go public has been "just about to go public" since 2007, which is when he took well over $100k from a group of investors and most
likely used it for his personal agendas. His home in Long Grove is currently getting repossessed by the bank. He sells shares fraudulently to unaccredited shareholders, clearly violating the law. He will tell you great stories of how much he has accomplished in life, and how he knows many celebrities and government officials, and what a generous person he has been to everyone, and that everyone just tried to screw him over, but those are all lies, as he simply manipulates people. He will even go as far as tell you "secrets" about his personal life just to get you to trust him more.
What Alex Shchekin does is this: he takes your $, makes many excuses each and every time asking him why he hasn't delivered on his many promises, and waits for the time to expire for you to be able to sue him, all while living on the $ that you supposedly "invested" in him. In fact, if you try to sue him, he will simply use the same $ you gave him, or another person like you, to defend himself in court.
I'm not going to, but as I look at this small hand sized piece of steel and polymer, the overwhelming feeling to place a small casing, with some smokeless powder, and a copper 115 grain piece of metal, to then pull back the slide and hear the metal click into place and turn it on myself and end it is way too real.
The drone of everyday life, and the overwhelming feeling of loneliness is oppressive.
I know I won't kill myself today, I know that for a fact because I can still keep in mind all of the people who love me who I would be leaving behind. I couldn't do that to them. I can bare it at least for the dark moments those thoughts enter my mind for the time being.
However I am afraid that one day, I won't be able to hold back the darkness that somehow lives in my mind. I have a fantastic life and people I love and a job that I enjoy and a comfortable place to live and everything I could possibly want.
For whatever reason that I can't explain there is this dark, angry, sad, lonely, scared piece of me in the back of my mind that is so afraid of life, and getting hurt that it seems to think that blowing a 9mm hole in my head is a better option than trying to live. Every time I am able to talk him down, but like I said I am afraid that one day I won't be able to.
I know this piece of me is trying to protect me, but I want to be able to live my life, and that just comes with ups and downs, and getting hurt, and feeling sad, and being heartbroken from time to time, I know this, the stronger part of me knows this, but that smaller part won't go away.
Ive tried counseling, I have done it for more than 10 years, I've talked about this part of me to my parents and they have been understanding and supportive, and I take care of myself, I get enough sleep, and I eat regularly and do everything I can to take care of myself. I cannot seem to make this part of me leave me alone. I want it to. I need it to. I cannot keep this part of me. It's keeping me from healthy relationships.
If Antifa starts an armed revolt in large numbers the police by themselves may not have the numbers to stop them. If the police are not enough, or they are ordered to stand down, then I would advocate for the National Guard to help out, and if necessary, armed patriots as a backup, and even just to defend themselves. Defending yourself against an armed Antifa revolt is a good way to thin their numbers at least. If the police are overwhelmed it would be good for them call for help from the National Guard rather than risk being wiped out or just being overrun by Antifa members. I had long thought I would fight Neo-Nazis with guns IF they revolted in large numbers or took over our country. They just don't have enough numbers to be a serious threat in that sense in spite of their desires. Concerning Antifa, even if they don't have enough to take control of the US, they are a bigger threat. If they only peacefully protest or even only riot and it is contained, I will personally just support efforts to contain them. If they break out in a mass armed revolt, and come near where I am at, then they are in seriously trouble from me personally, and that means me handling firearms if necessary.
Anonymous fights for freedom, Antifa fights to subjugate people in a communist dictatorship. Anonymous fights for national sovereignty and against a the New World Order, Antifa wants to abolish nation states in favor of world government. Anonymous favors peaceful protests, Antifa uses violence. The ideals of Anonymous and Antifa are polar opposites. Any Antifa members claiming to be part of Anonymous are fake Anonymous and are not welcome as long as they hold to the ideals of Antifa. Anonymous opposes real racism, real Nazism, and REAL fascism. Antifa opposes the fake versions of these. Antifa may have a lot of members, but Anonymous is legion. If Antifa is stupid enough to try an armed revolt many members of Anonymous will protest imminent danger with more aggressive forms of protest (that is at the point of a gun or knife). Antifa is a fake revolution unto slavery if they succeed. Anonymous represents the true revolution to protect our freedoms. People who stand up for the ideals of freedom are Anonymous. By that definition Donald Trump is Anonymous.
https : //[filtered hyperlink] . com/watch?v=IV-nrp3WsN8
To Antifa, ALL Americans that believe that the US should be a sovereign nation, a believe in a free market economy, and even using free speech to say things they don't agree with, is Nazism and Racism. When they say they are anti-racist and anti-Nazi their being against (rightly) White Supremacist Nazi groups is just a SMALL part of what they are talking about, they are talking about all normal Americans. I saw a video where they were chanting "no more USA" at a protest. I would advovate that all Antifa members that commit crimes with rioting be thrown in jail, and GOD help them if they attempt an armed revolt, GOD HELP them, because if they attempt an armed revolt many of them will pass from this life into the next VERY FAST...as fast as people defending the US can fire gun, and even truly fully automatic guns too. I am not sure they would deploy the gatling minigun in cities because of collateral damage, but if they caught revolutionary armies in open areas then they might use those kinds of guns. The gatling minigun has a wicked fast rate of fire with accuracy. If Antifa WANTED to be godly they would be protesting the globalist Illumanati powers that want to take away our nation. What they fail to realize is that electing Donald Trump is the spearhead of the TRUE REVOLUTION against the globalists and a major victory in the revolution that I AM PROUD to be a part of. I don't need to cover myself with a hood or hat and mask.
I heard that Antifa may be planning an armed revolt late Oct to early November. I heard that they plan to first attack police stations to neutralize local police. If that actually succeeds, and they don't get themselves shot or arrested in the attempt, then they will still have to get through the National Guard, armed Patriot groups, and regular citizens with guns and conceal carry, and in an extreme emergency the US Army with Posse Comitatus temporarily suspended. My advice is to make the protests in early Nov peaceful, and even with no rioting. I know with Antifa that is asking a lot. If an armed revolt is attempted then more Antifa blood will be unnecessarily spilled. Trump is not going anywhere. Antifa wants a full blown Bolshevik revolution it seems. Funny how Putin seems to be a greater American Patriot than many Americans. My advice to Antifa is they will save many of their own lives by not going through with any plans for an armed revolt.
I am in way over my head in debt, I don't even know how or why i got into this mess. all i know is that it feels like I am drowning in it..and I have no solution for it.
I read online that debt stems from an underlying issue, i.e depression, self esteem. e.g..when i am sad i spend to feel better, at the time i am borrowing i feel like i am sorting that sadness out but in actually sense i am not fixing anything..its the same thing with alcohol, i drink hoping it numbs how i feel but it doesn't really cause its like after that i find myself in a worse place. Each time i come up with a way to settle my debt, I start okay but at some point something goes wrong and my interest rates go up and i simply cant pay off the debt. Again a friend of mine was meant to lend me some money at a very low rate so i could sort out these debts that give me stress.
but that has not happened. and now again my mind goes into trying to get more debt to pay off the debt. Is there no easy way surely?.
what i think is needed..
1. clearly i don't have financial discipline, i need someone to be accountable to for my spending..idk, i wish there was a switch i could use to sort this out
2. I need someone to be accountable to for my drinking
3. I need to figure out something i can do that i will enjoy doing and won't need to drink or spend money aimlessly..
what these two habits are doing to me;
1. all this drinking is obviously unhealthy for me, my teeth are messed up, i am practically obese and don't feel good about how i look so that is also doing a number on my self esteem. I may end up losing a guy i love
2. The debt - i can't even sleep in peace, i am always tossing and turning..wondering what i will do or how i will pay it off. This causes me to feel very anxious..i wake up with what i think are anxiety attacks and this just messes up my whole day. how will i cope if this continues? I realise i have a big problem.
4. I get sad a lot, and i wonder if there is just something wrong with me
5. I fear i will one day do something drastic just so all this can go away..
6. What do I do before i get to such a point...
Am I the only who feels this way? I know people say, it all starts from you..etc, but it's hard and there doesn't seem to be a guide. So..where do i go from here?
I wish i could enroll myself at some kind of camp where i work for my keep and im not given any money.. i need to break this cycle badly, I am so tired of living like this. I am too old for this, what am i going to teach my future kids.
What do I do?
I wonder what is right thing to do ? Fiight for your rights or your values with impervious person like zombies or to run away with the fact that no one is going to understand .
Best place to rape hospital parking lot get a van and a gun easy pickings
At least its a step up from feeling suicidal, I guess. I just want to run away from this life. From a job that means nothing to me. From a wife who I'm not sure if I love any more. From a life that just feels so small. All I can think about is disappearing - taking a bag of gear and some money, and just walking away. But once I get tired of walking, what then?
I try. I try so hard to be the best person I can be. I am a full time college student who lives at home with my mother, stepfather, and little brother. Alongside being a full time college student, I work part time, have many friends, and a boyfriend. I thought college was supposed to be fun. What happened to all the stories we heard or read about? You know the ones where everyone goes out drinking and partying even on weeknights? Where is that at? Why is it that I feel that nothing I do is right? I am literally making myself sick with just how stressed I am.
I see what my mom was talking about now. How stressful everything is. I am failing a class, that is supposed to be one of the easy classes. My boyfriend just doesn't understand, my parents don't understand, no one understands. It seems that the ones who would understand aren't even really my friends anymore. I feel as if I don't belong. I don't belong in college, I don't belong at work, I don't belong in my friendships, relationship, and family. I just don't belong. I literally cannot do it anymore. I am getting to the point to ending everything, not life, just school and work and my relationship.
So please just answer my question: What happens now?
I've lived a long life. Fought in a war, tried to be the best possible person I could be for the ones I cared about. It was never enough though. You can't repair the damage you cause no matter how hard you try you are what your weakest moment was. I ask forgiveness from those I've hurt and those who were affected by my choices. They were only meant to give others a better shot at life at a life worth living. I spent years training my body and heart to endure any obstacle, but I didn't think it would be too much for you to handle my friend. I never meant to show you how cold I could be, but I guess monsters all eventually reveal themselves with time. I just hope I've plucked our enough of them so that others can live happier that those of our past. Isn't it the cruelest thing to know that you can't ever change, no matter how much good you do. I pray no one else has to walk my path, and chooses to love instead of hate.
if I am famous
they won't look down on me
If I obeyed
I would know what to be
I sit at home thinking
I can't tell what I think
sit at home drinking
I just lay down and sink
why do you hate me?
can I just die today?
have perfect families
eating at Chicken-Filet
if I am famous
They'll look at me nice someday
they will still hate me
I'm a per-ver-ted thing
I don't really want
I don't really want to change
sometimes I feel
sometimes I feel such shame
can I really want to?
can I turn sin away?
can it be?
an old man with a family?
and can I love myself one day?
all I can do is pray
- for God's mercy
all I can do is pray
can I really want to
can I really want to change?
can I really want to
can I really want to change?
'Would you talk to a good looking person or an ugly one?'
Why does it matter? You can talk to anyone, I don't get this kind of logic of people having to look decent enough to be talked to, whAt a whole load of bull.
i just wanted to try and see how this 'anonymous' posting went.
Yea life's crap, it's unfair and contains fake hope and dreams.
Idek what I'm saying, I just needed something to let some of my nonsense out.
Everyone's prob thought this once in their life but it still makes me wonder how much of a difference would it make if I wasn't here? Prob not a lot, but it still makes you wonder right?
I take my 9 yr old brother to the bus everyday except one day when I had work really early. But in this scenario I was going to work at 11 am while my ma is going at 9 am so I shot her a text saying hey take him to the bus? She says no. See I'm pretty upset cause he's her son but I'm always taking care of him and shit. I mean she just got a new job Wi the morning shift and I'm like cool but then her schedule was matched up to mine so he'd be home alone... She tells me to make them change my hours so I did even though I loved my hours.
The only reason I haven't killed myself is because I don't want my kids to who are young to not get the chance to have a dad. Most days I'm an amazing dad, but that is all I can do. No person or thing perks my interest anymore. I'm going to end it all in an "accident" in 6 months to make sure my life insurance premiums will be at their peak, and that all of the money for them is set. I realized over time I am to unstable to be thier dad, and that they deserve a shot at a great life. Feel awful, but have accepted it and cherish the time I see them a lot. I know they are gonna do amazing things and me being gone ensures that sadly.
cancer and surgery were a vacation compared to dealing with store customers
My best friend is a selfish person. It's almost that time of year again October, which in tell brings fun activities and days such as Halloween. Three years ago my friend and I had nothing to do on Halloween so we searched for ideas and end up finding this Halloween activity that is costly but we had both always wanted to do. At the time I wasn't working and had absolutely no money for it but she begged me to go, so what did I do? I put together all the money I could scrap together over a couple of days in order to pay for it. Well now that time has come where we planned on going to the event again, but this time she doesn't have the funds to pay for it, and she pretty much shuts down the convo about it or says she cant right now. How is that fair for me? When I didn't have the funds she begged me still and I did everything I could to go but when the shoe is on the other foot she says nope, she cant do it. She always does this, makes her life and problems so much more important than mine, and this is in all life situations with her. I would go with someone else but she's my only best friend ugh. I love our friendship but her constantly making herself the most important one and never taking into consideration my feelings doesn't feel good. I need to find more friends to balance out our relationship, so I'm less dependent on her, thus not getting hurt as much because I have other people to do those things with. Now the hard part is finding those people lol.
I used to have the best of friends and now I have no one to confide in. I'm young and I'm sure life will bring many lows, but realizing you've lost relationships you once before held so dearly are gone, can't be anything but one of life's most depressing heartaches.
I got sober and clean 12 and a half years ago. About five years ago, I started drinking and, in the last six months, I have one-three bottles of wine a day. I am upset and sad. I am in the middle of detoxing and it is very uncomfortable. I feel heartbroken at what my life has become. There is a tremendous amount that I have to live for. I need help and have resolved to write when I want to drink. There is not much worse...I want to crawl in a whole and die. As I write all of this, I am reminded of how much better it makes me feel to write.
I used to be apart of the anonyme.com bloggers and I blogged weekly nearly daily and I must say I loved it. Sharing my life and experiences, asking questions and hearing peoples point of view! I want that again a little community. I'm not one for expressing my emotions out loud so it really really helped and the fact that there is no judgment! Is this website like that? Is it just a simple ranting website I can go crazy on laughs nervously
Anyone share their thoughts or even more blogging sites?
When getting older, one thinks about how their life should be. Being successful in their career, a well adjusted and tight knit family, maybe friends that would be there for them in their times of need. Whatever it is, it is what we thought life would be like. But then something called reality steps in. And when reality steps in, the vision is usually completely different from the actual. That successful career actual is a mediocre one, where you can be replaced at the whim of others far less skilled then you. The well adjusted and tight knit family turns out to have so many issues and are so distant that it would take days to reach one another. And the friends, well let's just say that most of them are fair weather. More like acquaintances. And when the going gets tough, they find fair weather elsewhere. Life as it should be differs completely from what it actually is. Some might call this a life lesson. Something to learn from and pass on in the form of wisdom. But the real thing here is that it's life. And as we get dealt our hands, they are just that, our hands. You can't count on anyone other then yourself to play that hand. Sometimes you get 4 aces and the world is just as you thought it would be. And sometimes you have 5 different cards of 4 different suits that don't make anything other then a losing situation. Just a thought tonight.
Last night I got wine wasted with some work friends and well..let's just say when a bunch of girls drink wine together we tend to get extremely emotional. Being hangover on wine is not fun at all. My hangover only goes away whenever I get lots of rest or puke my guts out. Lucky for me, It was rest. I finally got up a little past noon to feed my dog, fish, and myself. I was really excited to eat my leftover kale caesar salad and a piece of jalapeno brisket pizza. I probably drank a gallon of water afterwards but hey, gotta stay hydrated right?
I finally got out the house and decided to study for my exam next week. I decided to go to my favorite coffee shop across town. With my windows rolled down and crisp breezes through my hair I felt relaxed. The most relaxed I've been in awhile. I took my time cruising to my destination and thought about myself and how much I have changed. I've learned to let go of the past no matter what it is and not regret any of it. I wouldn't do anything differently. The past me would think the new me is faking it but I can honestly say I am content. I truly enjoy the simple things in life. I don't overthink things and mentally I feel that everything has a place and will run it's course. The trick is to stay calm. Even though I might sound like a fortune cookie, I feel that every word is exactly how I feel about life at this moment. Enjoy life.
I just woke up and I'm crying.
Today. Is. A. Not. So. Good. Day.
In spite of your arguments, your threats of divorce. The constant bickering. Bc of Willie Love of oppressing, watching me. Willie waits to we hrs I'm the morning while he's up. Not sleeping, tormented, to oppress and watch over me sleeping. So who do you think Willie is prioritizing you being his wife Gayle Harris.Or oppressing me. You be the judge. Constant and continually doing that very thing. That end your marriage in strife. Watching these girls oddly. Open your eyes to who you're married to. An adulter, who don't care about your marriage as much as he cares about watching me sleep..
Willie actions says it all. Willie T. Harris. Oct 11. 1956. Lays next to his wife but yet have this odd obsession with oppressing, watching me. Sleep, walk thru out my home, conversation, text, brush your teeth. What won't willie oppress. They argue. Gayle threatens divorce. But we know it's a lie.
Bc she yet keep him in her mother home. Going thru the same cycle again. 28 Av 164 st opa locka
So I've been battling with the thought of myself and our pesky neighbor depression. That one neighbor who is super aggressive or annoying. That one neighbor always lurking in the bushes or watching you through the blinds. Thatbone neigbor that always states you down with those judge eyes. The one neighbor you have to hide your personal life from. That neighbor who imposes themselves on you at the most inconvenient times. THAT NEIGHBOR THAT BARELY LETS YOU LEAVE YOUR HOUSE !!!
Aren't we all tired of this neighbor ? GEEZ!!!!
I HATE NEIGHBORS !
My life isn't going as planned right now and I feel like everything is completely falling apart for me. Parents are always arguing, we have to move out, we have no money for a house at the moment, I'm gaining what I feel is stress weight and my mind as been all over the place. I've been considering going to counseling to see if that makes me feel better or at least makes me feel like myself but I don't want people to think I'm mentally unstable or something. Honestly, the only place I feel like myself and safe is when I'm with my boyfriend, he literally feels like home to me. He makes everything so perfect again and I just wanna feel like that at all times since everything else is so unstable. When we're together he talks about our future and all that and ion so comfortable that I think that having a baby would make everything okay because it would be my own and no one can take it away just like you can easily take away a home, money, being able to say you're comfortable. I know I'm too young to do that and I have a life plan but I really feel like it's what I want. Don't get me wrong sometimes I'm just like "no I don't need a baby I'm young what the fuck was I thinking?". I don't know what the point of this was but can someone please leave some advice for me? Please?
When the balance is shifted, and you're forced to lose.
Like the sun and the moon, I will circle you until you bloom;
I will crush, I will maul, I will burn until I get to you.
Overtook some standstill cars in London this morning - opposite lane was moving slow and had an empty cycle lane of buffer, and I had plenty of time to move back in behind cars - black cab driver mock-swirved to pretend to hit me. Very amusing.
Does anyone ever just feel that if they leave where they are now something so much better awaits, like an escape or adventure? Like an adventure from a book or something. I just don't think I can separate fiction and real life anymore.
I am not attracted to large women. I can celebrate all their good qualities, but a larger size does not turn me on.
Send me your daughters for specialized training. The nature of the training requires that they be 18 or older. I will certainly whip them into good shape.
I like fucking different types of women. I am attracted to various races, various heights, various hair and eye colors, various chest sizes, various sizes except for really large women that are losing their feminine shape and are at an unhealthy weight. I also am attracted to women who have a sense of humor, are fun to be around, are intelligent, and are friendly.
I saw a YouTube video of these women protesting on the street. They said that Trump said that ALL Mexicans were rapists because he talked about illegals that committed some rapes. Trump was OBVIOUSLY NOT TALKING ABOUT ALL MEXICANS. One stupid woman also said that ALL WHITE MALES were evil JUST BECAUSE they were white males. This woman has been brainwashed.
Honestly my life is not the best I wish I knew a way out and way I wouldn't hurt anyone a life that joy was number one were love is endless and money wasn't important where I could breath and feel relaxed pain is not physical but mentally life is hard but why
I am not sexually turned on by large women. If someone is only slight above average I am or can be, but if someone is way overweight I am not. I am nice to everyone. I will be friends with women I am not turned on by, but if some women are mean I will avoid them. If large women THINK that they are entitled to have me be turned on by them, which I am beginning to understand is true of SOME, then it just can't be forced, and it won't cause me to suddenly feel attracted to them. I am attracted to a wide range of women but certain more extreme things turn me off, such as being very large. Being unhealthy turns me off in general. If a woman is addicted to drugs, that also turns me off very fast, even if she is in a shape that normally attracts me. I am on a low carb diet and am rapidly losing weight myself, even though I don't do much exercise. I would encourage larger people to reach a healthy weight.
I am feeling nothing but alone.and depressed and I just look.out to the sky and it's so empty. I'm so tired of being alone, and being the nice guy to do everything to help the girls I'm with and they just leave. What about me?...
I want comments from people on their weight vs. the amount of carbohydrate rich foods they do or don't consume. I also want to hear if people have an easier time losing weight or keeping it off if they limit their carbs but at the same time vs. little to no exercise. I think this is true, but having said that, some exercise is good for EVERYONE. It still has health benefits even if re-arranging what you eat makes it easier to stay more fit. If it is truly this easy to slim down, and by personal experience and with a few friends, it seems to be that easy, to cut your carbs. I am losing weight with a carb restricted diet with pathetic exercise regime. But if it is indeed this easy, I intend to educate a lot of people about it. Also if it is this easy then I am going to focus all of my sexual attention on more fit women only, or those who have lost a sufficient amount of weight to be attractive, even if a little bigger, and who are making progress towards their medically ideal weight. I do not even eat whole grains. Those are NOT a health food. Fruits and vegetables are truly healthy foods. Fruits do contain a lot of sugar, but limited fruit with exercise should be fine. Based on my knowledge now, and realizing that it is easy to lose weight and keep it off (even if the progress takes time, I have no interest at all in screwing really big women. I do not care if it seems cold. Big women get a handshake or a hug from me, with friendly conversation, but i cannot do physically more than that with them. A long time ago I did a temporary job in a hospital and I heard this diabetic woman really crying in pain. I wish as few people as possible go through that. and a high carb diet pushes people to be pre-disposed to diabetes, regardless of genetics.
I am embarking on a great diet to change my life. I am going extremely low carb, very little table sugar, more meat, more fat, more vegetables, a little fruit. I am feeling better. I am losing weight. I am eating more "healthy fats" and I am less scared of fatty meat if I cut my carbs. In fact with a low carb diet I seem to need more fat calories to have enough energy to function well, but I think fat calories are healthier than carb calories. From recent research I think too many carbs are indicated in heart disease, diabetes, and even some cancers.
I am so weak. I hate the life I have come to know. I had great ambitions. I had great talent. I feel like it is over now. Not a day goes by that I don't feel like the world would be better off without me. I am too weak to pull the trigger though. I am lost. I am a nobody. I have done horrible things in my short lifetime. I wish it could all be over. I have so much guilt. My drunkeness has caused so much harm. I hate myself. I have low self esteem. I think I am ugly. One day I will end it.
Sometimes I wish I could stop existing, not die though. I'm not suicidal, and I would never want to hurt the people in my life, and especially my pets. My life isn't bad either, I didn't have trauma or issues that would have dramatically impacted my views on life. But sometimes, when I'm alone with my thoughts, I think of what it would be like if I just never existed, and how the world would still go on, and the people around me would love other people and do different things. And I also get feelings of guilt? When I think about how lucky I am to be living a safe and healthy life, while others have so little, and so many people care for me even if they don't always show it... and I feel guilt over wanting to disappear and leave this life. When I'm alone, and I start to submerge myself into these scary thoughts, I think of messaging close friends. When I start to text them, it suddenly feels like they wouldn't be able to understand my thoughts, and that if I really exposed my mindset to them, they would just tell me to see a therapist or feel guilty for not being there enough to make me happy all the time. And it's not anyone's job to make sure I feel loved every single second of the day anyways. I don't really want to make a big deal over my thoughts, and I don't want to bring people down by unloading all my problems onto them. So I usually keep them to myself, and it's hard. As much as I want to let it all out and just have someone understand, I wouldn't want them to feel down because of it. I guess that's why I'm here unloading it to the internet to ease my mind. Sometimes I feel this way for just 10 minutes, and it passes quickly and I feel great afterwards, but other times it can last weeks, and I just don't feel like going out or socializing. When people try to reach out, I tell them I'm just tired or lazy and that it's nothing to worry about. It probably makes people mad at times because I seem flaky and lazy, and that if I went out I'd probably shake off my thoughts and feel great again. But I know that once I went home my thoughts would all come rushing back, even worse than before. Nothing makes me feel more alone than going home to an empty room after being surrounded by so many friends.