Give me my vodka.

wrote the following:

Hmm. I think I am an alcoholic. Maybe a drug addict. Maybe a little of both?

I can't remember the last night I didn't drink.

I spend all my money on alcohol, coke, X.

I am a very happy person.

I'm fit, I workout everyday. I have a lot of friends.  

But I don't know what I am going to do when I won't be able to drink myself to sleep every night.

Sometimes I'll have 1 drink. Sometimes I can't remember how many I have.  

Things are going to change soon and I don't know how I am going to handle them.  

People say they wish they were more like me, they wish they could have the outlook in life that I have.

I am always happy, always laughing, sober or not.

I have a deep dark secret though. I am my own worst enemy.  

I am going to kill myself if I don't stop.

I am not even old enough to legally drink yet.